Thank Fuck for That

Somehow, despite quite possibly the most disjointed display I have ever seen in my life, AS Roma have won a game away from home! Incredible. Mind you, they were helped by the world’s worst referee and a ludicrous sending off near the end of the first half, when Bordeux’s Henrique was sent for moving his arms around in the box, interpreted by the officiator as an assualt that wouldn’t look out of place in a post Croydon pub punch-up.

However, late into the second half and with Roma still trailing 1-0 in a game they could ill afford to even draw Spalletti sent on this man and things rapidly took a turn for the better:

'The New Italians'

That’s right, The New Italian and righteous brotherman Stefano Okaka Chuka. Now, the three Roma goals may have come from Vucinic and Julio ‘second touch is a tackle’ Baptiste, but to me and the denizens of the Trastevere pub we watched the match in, it was all down to the young chap (sort of). Though the hammered locals were ironically chanting ‘Okaka’ and humming the A-Team theme tune (in honour of his ridiculous Mr-T style mohican haircut), his introduction did actually make a difference; they suddenly started playing football, kept the ball for longer than three seconds and actually offered a threat to a Bordeux defence that had previously only had to deal with Mirko’s futile toiling after long balls that were at the same time hopeful and hopeless.

The goals were crackers too, especially the third, where a cracking cross-field ball was volleyed back across goal by Taddei straight into the onrushing Beast, who didn’t have to worry about actually controlling the ball, instead letting it bounce off his foot into the net. Great news all round then, apart from the fact we now have a incredibly tight group thanks to Chelsea’s non-performance in Romania (plus comedic injuries – Alex’s buttock problems, anyone?), and the realisation that Cluj are actually a pretty good side indeed.

Next up: the horrible Chelsea-Roma double bill. Will the Liquidator and Spangly Princess be able to not violently assault each other with hatchets, hammers, carving knives and spanners? Will Roma take a tanking at the Bridge that rivals their bumming at the hands of Man United? Will Roma pull their fingers out their arses and make sure they qualify alongside us? There will be all this and more folks. Don’t touch that dial.

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3 Responses

  1. in fairness Okaka has a name designed for chanting…

  2. Is there any way you can play the home leg in Toscana instead of at the Bridge?

  3. Remind us, who are you supporting for that game, the team you go watch, Roma, or the team who’s management you always slate?

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